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CRISIS: Teen Violence – a Quick look at Statistics and Prevention
Teen violence, struggling teens and families in chaos and disarray, homes and family environments like constant war-zones, characterized by melt-downs, physical and mental outbursts and abuse, violent outbreaks and unacceptable destructive behaviour towards self and others. Teen violence driven by and leading to fear, distrust, run-ins with the law and judicial system, total disregard for others causing bodily harm and emotional pain and distress, hurting, loss, fear for physical safety of parent and siblings, threats, anger, rage, inexplicable, deliberate absences, no emotional connections, defiance and open disrespect and even lashing out in physical assault. Sounds scary enough yet? Well this is the situation that hundreds of families face – sometimes refusing to admit that there is a problem, not willing to break the silence, afraid, ashamed and generally lost and at odds about what to do. Dealing with teen violence asks for a dedicated strategy and some suggestions are listed below: Formalizing and negotiating, mediating and establishing better parameters and guidelines – laying down the law, ground rules, Emphasizing the development of safety, growth, and fulfillment of individuals or groups. Without rules there is chaos, an unsafe world to live in – address the violent teen’s need for structure. To effectively combat teen violence or when dealing with defiant, delinquent, difficult or troubled teens, you need to create several layers of preventative rules to assist them and compliance depending on the following 1. CLEAR UNDERSTANDING: Ensure that the rules are clearly understood – avoid misunderstandings, conflicts and manipulation. Be specific, put it in writing, paraphrase, agree on it – sign off if required to get accountability and ownership and enable enforcement 2. MONITORING: make them aware that behaviour will be monitored on an on-going basis, awareness and incentive, cross-check, verify and communicate 3. CONSISTENCY AND ENFORCEMENT: predictability and dependability underwrites and ensures safety – avoid sporadic enforcement, double standards, chaos, confusion and resentment 4. CONSEQUENCES: The consequences used are effective as deterrents, immediate with follow-up - The key here is: (i) use consequences that have significant meaning and/or deterrent value to your teen, and (ii) the severity of the consequences should match the severity of the violation. If the strategy for coping with teen violence is found to be lacking in any or all of these areas, it will drastically affect the compliance with the rules and lead to a less desirable result and outcome. Sometimes the situation might even merit looking at getting outside help, such as a residential center, treatment program, or specialty school. |
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